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Emotional Recovery of Divorce

 

As you begin the emotional journey of healing you will find yourself noticing the number of losses divorce brings.  You not only lose your partner and friend but may also lose the person who cooks, cleans, does the finances, keeps up the cars and lawn, does the repairs, etc.  You will also notice that the routine of the past has been replaced with empty space, especially if children are involved and custody is shared.  Though you might find yourself wallowing in these losses, it is important for you to pick yourself up and focus on what you’re going to do now.  Take a good look at what you do have and consider making healthy changes in your life. Below are some helpful suggestions:

 

·         Identify and manage your emotions.  You will need time to heal and to adjust to the events of your divorce. Find a productive outlet for feelings. The healing process takes time, more for some than others. 

 

·         It is important you accept that your relationship is over.  You are now a single individual and possibly responsible for the daily care of yourself and your children. 

 

·         Avoid becoming obsessed with your past relationship and mistakes you might have made.  Living in the past and second guessing your actions will get you no where, except quite possibly angrier. 

 

·         Stop blaming others for your unhappiness.  Though it’s okay to be angry and unhappy, after awhile others will avoid you if that is all you focus on.  Make an effort to talk about other things in your life besides your divorce situation. 

 

·         Join a support group.  Seek out professional help.

 

·         Read.  There is a great deal of information on divorce and self-help books.

 

·         Get your finances in order.  Be aware of where you stand with your assets and debts in order to avoid future financial troubles.

 

·         Allow yourself a little pampering.  Now is a good time to take care of yourself.

 

·         Avoid the need to fill the emptiness with another partner until you are emotionally prepared.

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After Divorce Topics: (click on each for description)

 

Understand Your Financial Needs

Changing Your Name After Divorce

Get Involved

Friends and Family

Dating After Divorce

Dating and Children

Remarriage

Communicating with Your Ex

 

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